I'm a TAB Pig

"Hoser" is:  Dale Gardner

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Hoser is our resident "Fire Marshal Bill" & is a 25+ year Fire Department Battalion Chief from the Maryland area....which made it pretty easy to come up with a call-sign for him.

 While he hasn't seen his toes in quite some time ("many moons, Grasshopper...many moons..."), he's said to be quick on his feet in a fire. We think that means he's the quickest to find an exit in a burning building ("Hey guy's...there's FIRE in this damn place!?!"). 

Hoser was accepted into the TabPig class of 2002 with D'Ernie and Forrest and has yet to make it to a WAB, or even to a CAAS. Actually, we think he's afraid to go to his first WAB, as tradition holds that the FNG ($!@%* New Guy) has to buy the beer. And with this bunch....we're talking 2nd mortgages on the house. He has made several trips to "Swine-noa" ("The Swannanoa Gathering"). This is where he learns to get in touch with his feminine side.....be it flannel or blouses made by "Omar the Tent Maker". 

At Swine-noa, Hoser has studied guitar with Al Petteway, Don Ross, Steve Baughman,Steve James, Muriel Anderson, and Scott Ainslie, mandolin with Marcy Marxer, singing and harmony with Penny Nichols. None of this study has helped, which is why we haven't kicked him out yet.

Besides a couple of Kottke tunes, Hoser plays a few Al Petteway tunes and a conglomeration of other stuff from Celtic to blues. He also plays all of the standard tunes that are forbidden in any acoustic guitar store on any weekend: "Classical Gas", "Dust in the Wind", "Stairway to Heaven", "Signe"............

The movie star in the group, Hoser spent 3 days standing in the background for the movie "Ladder 49" (Due for release October 8, 2004) starring John Travolta, who he is pictured with here.

Anyway, we met Hoser through the RMMGA guitar group on usenet. He's currently playing:

  • 1993 LKSM-12 with a Fishman Matrix undersaddle pickup. (This LKSM is better than either Bernie's or Hoink's )
  • 1998 LKSM-6 with Fishman Rare Earth
  • 1997 Taylor 414Koa with B-Band UST- gorgeous tone - his DADGAD guitar
  • 2002 Taylor 710 Englemann/rosewood
  •  Mid 60's nylon classical by Espana 
  • Kentucky KM250-s mandolin
  • He's equipped his piglets with a Taylor 412 (Jeffrey) and a Baby Taylor with homebuilt SBT pickup (Jonathan).
  • All played through an Ultrasound AG-50D
  • Bodhran and hand drums (He also builds these funky "ashiko" drums....but we let him in anyway.)

Oh, and Hoser has been working on the TabPigs.org website....which explains why HIS bio is just a little longer than the others.

www.dalegardner.net